What’s up North worth seeing?

[Graydo]

Where is it up north they have all the fleas that bite you I heard about, I’ve got net things on the van, never ever used them but this might be the first, there is even one in the main had door that slides out, bought fly killer and a special blue light, the van will look like a kebab shop ? Can the fleas come in through the air vents? ?

You're right to be careful,

I once had no water after a particularly cold winter, after careful inspection by my dealer I was told I had a haggis nest in my grey water tank!

All but one were eventually re-homed via the SSPCA but on cold nights I can still hear the one that didn't make it scamper around eating the fleas (their favourite food).

It feels like someone walking over my grave....


Graydo

 

[596]

They like nice alloys, preferably with Michelin Agilis tyres ???

? I have them, where can I get Ducato maxi lock nuts?

 

[Stewart J]

Don’t bother venturing into Northumberland the PROPER North it’s a horrible place we all speak funny, probably to cold for you genteel Southern Folk. ???

 

[596]

Don’t bother venturing into Northumberland the PROPER North it’s a horrible place we all speak funny, probably to cold for you genteel Southern Folk. ???

Do I need to bring a dressing gown, my wife has packed pyjamas for both of us she said it will be too cold for her nightie, we have heating but being a Swift I have to prepare for nothing to work worst case scenario ?

 

[63720]

After watching GOT I wouldn't go there, best ask if they'll deliver it.

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[Baileysbus]

When we go to the Caribbean we take pens, pencils, note books and the likes to hand out to kids up in the hills, any idea what northern kids like, the picture of them all in one room looks awful, what about woolly hats and scarves?

Take plenty cardboard boxes ? so they can use them to live in’t middle o’t road. Oh and take some fisherman’s friends or uncle joes mint balls for the adults. Saves burning too much coal in’t grate. ?

 

[Baileysbus]

When we go to the Caribbean we take pens, pencils, note books and the likes to hand out to kids up in the hills, any idea what northern kids like, the picture of them all in one room looks awful, what about woolly hats and scarves?

 

[MyrtleGuru]

... we wanted to see a famous northern seaside town so going to a place called Cleethorpes for fish and chips and an ice cream... ?

When in Cleethorpes make sure you have something to barter with, like shiny beads or something. Proper money there is only used by people who pay taxes (a small minority). At least you will get some proper fish, though -- haddock -- not that bottom-feeding rubbish cod stuff that other parts of the country eat or, God forbid, something abominable called rock salmon that people in that there London have been rumoured to eat.

 

[dabhand]

I’d take a pikost if I were you!

 

[Sus3v]

I’m a born and bred northerner but I went to uni down south. Managed to persuade one of my friends who had never been ‘oop north’ that we still took bath ‘in tub’ and used candles for lighting. Bless.

My Mr Evans had a similar story persuading his workmates that south wales valleys people lived in caves and where Everybody thought the bath was to store coal in ??‍

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[Richard n Ann]

Take a few small mirrors to give away. That will delight the local simpletons, they will regard them as magic!

 

[MyrtleGuru]

In the south en-suite bathrooms are the norm, whereas in the north en-plein-air is the favoured option:

 

[mike mcglynn]

blimey that’s a posh bath with two pair of handles

 

[pappajohn]

my wife is not going to understand me at supper tonight when I practice my northern ?.

You CANNOT practice Northern, you'll sound daft.
You have to be born to it.

 

[Littlewheels]

If you ever manage to get your geography correct and get as far north as Yorkshire you won’t get the welcome genuine visitors get but you will most certainly get the Barnsley Kiss if you ask any of those questions, now that’s welcome you won’t forget.

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[Ingwe]

You may like it t'up North. It's like living in the 1950s. Everyone trying to get by on 30 bob a week!

 

[596]

You CANNOT practice Northern, you'll sound daft.
You have to be born to it.

Aye up papeur john, wea'ar lookin forrad teur t' experience, gonneur sa far north will be an adventure, see t' pictures 'a' av bin posted confirms wee thoughts, teur for thy advice 'n 'elp ?

 

[596]

What lagers do the northerners drink, should I take some Fosters and Stellas?

 

[pappajohn]

What lagers do the northerners drink, should I take some Fosters and Stellas?

Nah.... We have those.....too many to remember but Carlsburg, Carling, Corona, Tiger, Tsingtao, Krónanbourg, Peroni (for those with no taste buds), even some stuff from France they laughingly call lager.
We even have bitter and stuff from garden sheds with twigs and slugs in it.... real ale I think they call it.

 

[PeteH]

? I have them, where can I get Ducato maxi lock nuts?

There are Guys in Liverpool, who have them for sale, second hand, (they get them off the posh cars on piles of bricks). Its a by product of their main business.

stuff from garden sheds with twigs and slugs in it..

I thought that was the stuff made from apples with the worms in?, And several dead rats?. you know?, Zider?.

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[Baileysbus]

What lagers do the northerners drink, should I take some Fosters and Stellas?

Greenall Whitley ........ takes a bit of finding these days

 

[Mr B]

What lagers do the northerners drink, should I take some Fosters and Stellas?

Us northerners only drink fosters if we’re driving ?

 

[138go]

Newcastle Brown Ale, of course! But seeing as you’re actually going to the Midlands and not up north, you will be spoilt for choice.

Castle Rock Brewery

Castle Rock Brewery is located in the heart of Nottingham. We brew an exciting range of beers from the traditional to the experimental.

www.castlerockbrewery.co.uk

Whilst you’re in Nottingham you should head to our water sports centre and country park. They have a fabulous campsite!

 

[BobtheBass]

Meths with fish, paraffin with meat.

 

[busby]

We are travelling up North to collect our new motorhome, will be visiting exciting places such as Grantham, Sherwood Forest (got ideas from a forum member for there ?), Chesterfield, Doncaster then we wanted to see a famous northern seaside town so going to a place called Cleethorpes for fish and chips and an ice cream, then Lincoln before stopping in Nottingham en Route back to the safety of London ?

Some basic questions:
Is it cold in these places, do we need thermal clothing, coats etc
Are people easy to understand or do you need to listen carefully and speak slowly
Are people friendly up there
Do they accept debit cards or do we need to take cash
Is it safer than London
Are the roads narrow
What are their driving standards like
What type of food do they eat, I take all my own to France, wondered if I should take my own this time, I heard they fry everything even mars bars ?
Can you drink the water
Any recommendations for things to see and do, only having a day in each place to test the van out before driving back to London, if there are any issues it will be going back to the dealer on the way back to London

Thanks ?

We still burn Southern Softees at the stake up here,,Stay where you are,,BUSBY?

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[busby]

Where is it up north they have all the fleas that bite you I heard about, I’ve got net things on the van, never ever used them but this might be the first, there is even one in the main had door that slides out, bought fly killer and a special blue light, the van will look like a kebab shop ? Can the fleas come in through the air vents? ?

You shoul know all about insects that bite if you go to South of France every year.BUSBY.

 

[596]

You shoul know all about insects that bite if you go to South of France every year.BUSBY.

No fleas where we go, however have been on a site in Frejus by a river, f that never going back, bitten to hell ?

 

[Christoph]

I’d stick with the “safety” of London if I were you! Don’t come up here you might want to stay.

 

[596]

Is it true they deep fry everything, wondering if I should go to Costco and get food to take?

 

[Emmit]

I just went out and bought a ratchet strap for the front doors a hint I found reading another thread, probably travelled up north as well. I can’t take the shotgun as I don’t have a safe fitted yet, so will get all the alarms activated, if I hear anything I can always send my wife out to check ?

So! She's from 'The North' then? you Southern Jessie. (I have read the previous posts and note that, apparently, you're not.) (But I doubt it)

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