Octopus attack.

[Realist]

 

[Realist]

Sorry I’ll get my coat.

 

[old-mo]

A man walks into a bar and he has a pet octopus. He sits down at the bar and says to the bartender "give us two beers over here!" The bartender walks over and see's the octopus and he says, "Didn't you see the sign over there it says no pets allowed!" The man say's to the bartender, "oh but you don't understand this is a special octopus and he can play any musical instrument that you have." The bartender replied back, "well I'll tell you what, if he can play any instrument you can both drink for free all night!" The bartender walks up to the band playing and grabs a guitar. He puts it down on the bar. The octopus crawls up on the bar and feels around the guitar for a little while, then finally he picks it up and starts jamming. He's so good he sounded like Jimi Hendricks! The bartender was amazed and says, "alright lets try one more". This time he goes into the back room and brings out a dusty old set of bagpipes and promptly put them on the bar and says "lets see him play this!" The octopus starts crawling all over the bagpipes. He continues this for quite awhile. The bartender shouted out " See I knew he couldn't play all these instruments!" And the man replies, "Just give him a few more minutes... as soon as he figures out he can't have sex with it, he'll play it!"
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[Coastal Cruiser.]

Tried catching a little Octopus once when in holiday to Cyprus, was about 5ft out from the beach and in shallow water and I spotted him, dived on him and grabbed hold but he was a slippery bugger and shot off.
Kids were gutted as we were going to put it on Mrs CC as she was half asleep sunbathing, she ended up with a nice lump of seaweed instead

PS: Lucky he was not grabbing on a little higher up as that would have made you squeal a bit for sure

 

[Nanniemate]

Our two grandkids were stung by an octopus when swimming off a remote island in Thailand a few years ago. They were treated by staff at the only holiday resort on the island before being moved to the mainland and hospital. Rash and itching on their arms and legs and were told it was life threatening. I can't remember if it was the blue ringed octopus but they can be deadly apparently.

Blue rings also in Australia and often the beaches have warnings and do stop swimming not sure if this is true but seen somewhere they kill more people than sharks

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[bigwood]

Our daughter had a habit of getting her words muddled up, in fact she still does.
After a trip to the Deep in Hull she told her teacher that an octopus has eight testicals. The teacher had to leave the room to control herself.
We always dreaded parents night and what her latest mix up was.