Pourquoi?! (1 Viewer)

[RustyRuss]

We have been on Ile de Re for the last two weeks, a little rainy to start with but 8 uninterrupted days of lovely sunshine……… until this morning!! We’re packing everything away in a F*****g thunderstorm!!! I’v come over all Victor Meldrew!!! Gone back to bed!!! Bo*****s to it!!!

Grumpy Russ

 

[Grasmere9]

Are you in a rush to leave or can you have a nice breakfast and pack up later?!

 

[Diabalo]

Years ago we was on the Ile de Re when one evening the nieghbours started digging small trenches around their vans and awnings, being a nosey old git I enquired to why, they said thunderstom. That night the mother of all thunderstorms raged for hours over La Rochell but luckily just missed us so not much rain. I wonder if it's a regular occurence with heavy rain.

 

[RustyRuss]

Are you in a rush to leave or can you have a nice breakfast and pack up later?!

Breakfast of croissants and pain au chocolat with a nice cuppa being worked on as we speak!!

 

[Grasmere9]

Breakfast of croissants and pain au chocolat with a nice cuppa being worked on as we speak!!

Perfect!! Enjoy

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[Zoobec]

Ile de Re is one of my favourite places not been in the van yet, can’t wait to go there again!

 

[L' Hobo]

We have been on Ile de Re for the last two weeks, a little rainy to start with but 8 uninterrupted days of lovely sunshine……… until this morning!! We’re packing everything away in a F*****g thunderstorm!!! I’v come over all Victor Meldrew!!! Gone back to bed!!! Bo*****s to it!!!

Grumpy Russ

Why did you pay for the Ferry/Train, you could have got more of both in East Anglia (except the rain of course)

Next time, stay in Cromer (other venues are available) and for a large payment (about the cost of the crossing) I, and another French speaker with onions hanging around his neck/handlebars, will come and ignore you while exchanging Gaelic words & gestures!

Advanced booking advised!

 

[seasideBill]

Ile de Re is one of my favourite places not been in the van yet, can’t wait to go there again!

Very heavy rain and thunderstorms just down the coast from there today, beginning to think grass might not have been a great idea!

 

[Spriddler]

Years ago we was on the Ile de Re when one evening the neighbours started digging small trenches around their vans and awnings, being a nosey old git I enquired to why, they said thunderstorm.

Very sensible, also recommended by the Caravan and Motorhome Club on their grass pitches.

 

[HKF]

We have been on Ile de Re for the last two weeks, a little rainy to start with but 8 uninterrupted days of lovely sunshine……… until this morning!! We’re packing everything away in a F*****g thunderstorm!!! I’v come over all Victor Meldrew!!! Gone back to bed!!! Bo*****s to it!!!

Grumpy Russ

On the back of your post, I checked the weather at home. Looks like the storm is headed our way, as usual. No doubt the grass will be two feet high by the time we get home. Had nothing but rain for months on end, now it's worse with sun and heat added to the mix!! We went to Spain for some sun for two weeks (a few weeks ago) and the grass was ridiculous when we got home. It should be parched at this time of year, with the mower having a summer break!!!

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[RustyRuss]

On the back of your post, I checked the weather at home. Looks like the storm is headed our way, as usual. No doubt the grass will be two feet high by the time we get home. Had nothing but rain for months on end, now it's worse with sun and heat added to the mix!! We went to Spain for some sun for two weeks (a few weeks ago) and the grass was ridiculous when we got home. It should be parched at this time of year, with the mower having a summer break!!!

Bloomin right!!

 

[RustyRuss]

To add insult to injury I’d booked a lovely forested site at Jumiere near Rouen tonight, didn’t leave Il de Re until 11.15am. What with needing fuel and so on, bought just off the motorway about 15 miles from Jumiere, we ended up, thanks to f*****g Google f*****g Maps (that’s what its called in our house!!)at a place called Hearteauville, only about 1.5km from Jumiere, BUT a ferry crossing across the Seine between us and it!!! 3.5tonne weight limit!! 25km detour!!! I can see my well deserved pint on the bar in the campsite!!! Major Meldrew moment!!! Kathryn said “That’s an unprecedented number of times you’ve used the fornication expletive, cease and desist please darling, it won’t get us there any quicker. Would you like a soothing neck rub? Perhaps an energising foot massage?”
We made it in the end, no food at the campsite
“I’ve only just managed to hire a cooking person, he doesn’t start until next week.”
“Any chance of a pint?”
“Je regret rien le bar ce fermez”
( A guy is winking at me as he savours a freshly poured 50cl 1664).
“Ok sweetness, into town, pick up your crutches!” (My beloved has hobbled round all holiday on crutches with a sprained ankle, sustained whilst dancing drunkenly to The Fratellis Chelsea Daggers in a pub in the Lake District a week before we went away).
Into town, they are having some kind of a town shindig, with execrable French live disco singer types, who thinking they are amazing but are truly (Kathryn has told me to stop swearing) awful! Food! Yes! Hotdogs! Yes! I mean NO!!!!!! All the wiser, older, locals have filled the four restaurants to capacity, I drove past a pizza takeaway place on the way into the town square. We screech to a halt outside it, Kathryn, in an admirable show of hungry desperation, casts her crutches to the ground and limp/hobble/runs to the door.
“Bonsoir Madame, Nous son fermez a neuf heures” ( It’s 9:01pm)
As I sit here eating a truly beautiful pizza, that the kind lady Pizzastress made for each of us, I reflect on how sad it is to realise that I prostrated myself before a 4’11” pizza goddess and gripped the bottom of her flour and tomato sauce stained apron and begged her in anguished tones “Please! Please! Please make us a pizza, we have travelled from Il de Re this morning, and I have been driving for 10 hours and I am starving! I will eat your apron if you refuse me!” ( Surprisingly a Google product, Google Translation, is quite good.)
To bring this tail of woe and misfortune to an end, we arrived back at the van at 9.20pm, Kathryn found a bottle of wine and the missing can of Hobgoblin Gold ( where the hell has it been?!) in the fridge and we have devoured pizza, wine and beer in short order and I’m now trying to kill a f*****g (that’s FLAMING!) mosquito that just whined past my head in search of more blood from my ravaged lower limbs.

Hey Ho!

Fellow campers tell me that it will take me 2.5 hours to travel 48 miles to Dieppe Ferry Terminal in the morning, that’s around 20 miles an hour, on a motorway? On a Sunday? In France? Is there something I’m missing……….. ?

Sleep well people!!


Russ

 

[L' Hobo]

To add insult to injury I’d booked a lovely forested site at Jumiere near Rouen tonight, didn’t leave Il de Re until 11.15am. What with needing fuel and so on, bought just off the motorway about 15 miles from Jumiere, we ended up, thanks to f*****g Google f*****g Maps (that’s what its called in our house!!)at a place called Hearteauville, only about 1.5km from Jumiere, BUT a ferry crossing across the Seine between us and it!!! 3.5tonne weight limit!! 25km detour!!! I can see my well deserved pint on the bar in the campsite!!! Major Meldrew moment!!! Kathryn said “That’s an unprecedented number of times you’ve used the fornication expletive, cease and desist please darling, it won’t get us there any quicker. Would you like a soothing neck rub? Perhaps an energising foot massage?”
We made it in the end, no food at the campsite
“I’ve only just managed to hire a cooking person, he doesn’t start until next week.”
“Any chance of a pint?”
“Je regret rien le bar ce fermez”
( A guy is winking at me as he savours a freshly poured 50cl 1664).
“Ok sweetness, into town, pick up your crutches!” (My beloved has hobbled round all holiday on crutches with a sprained ankle, sustained whilst dancing drunkenly to The Fratellis Chelsea Daggers in a pub in the Lake District a week before we went away).
Into town, they are having some kind of a town shindig, with execrable French live disco singer types, who thinking they are amazing but are truly (Kathryn has told me to stop swearing) awful! Food! Yes! Hotdogs! Yes! I mean NO!!!!!! All the wiser, older, locals have filled the four restaurants to capacity, I drove past a pizza takeaway place on the way into the town square. We screech to a halt outside it, Kathryn, in an admirable show of hungry desperation, casts her crutches to the ground and limp/hobble/runs to the door.
“Bonsoir Madame, Nous son fermez a neuf heures” ( It’s 9:01pm)
As I sit here eating a truly beautiful pizza, that the kind lady Pizzastress made for each of us, I reflect on how sad it is to realise that I prostrated myself before a 4’11” pizza goddess and gripped the bottom of her flour and tomato sauce stained apron and begged her in anguished tones “Please! Please! Please make us a pizza, we have travelled from Il de Re this morning, and I have been driving for 10 hours and I am starving! I will eat your apron if you refuse me!” ( Surprisingly a Google product, Google Translation, is quite good.)
To bring this tail of woe and misfortune to an end, we arrived back at the van at 9.20pm, Kathryn found a bottle of wine and the missing can of Hobgoblin Gold ( where the hell has it been?!) in the fridge and we have devoured pizza, wine and beer in short order and I’m now trying to kill a f*****g (that’s FLAMING!) mosquito that just whined past my head in search of more blood from my ravaged lower limbs.

Hey Ho!

Fellow campers tell me that it will take me 2.5 hours to travel 48 miles to Dieppe Ferry Terminal in the morning, that’s around 20 miles an hour, on a motorway? On a Sunday? In France? Is there something I’m missing……….. ?

Sleep well people!!


Russ

Ahh, the joys of foreign travel!

 

[Chris]

Bloody French

 

[L' Hobo]

Bloody French

and they, having the audacity of not speaking English and living in such a beautiful part of the world, takes the BISCUIT !
( another French Word meaning Twice Baked)

(Personally, I have no problem with them! )

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[DBK]

You might want to get one of these on your next trip to France and keep it for emergencies. They vary in quality so it can be a bit hit and miss but you won't starve.

 

[Zoobec]

You might want to get one of these on your next trip to France and keep it for emergencies. They vary in quality so it can be a bit hit and miss but you won't starve.

View attachment 917030

Or confit de canard. Best thing to come out of a tin!

 

[seasideBill]

Or confit de canard. Best thing to come out of a tin!

Duck & Chips, yum!

 

[Widge]

You think you got it bad, this was in the aube yesterday, quite spectacular lightning strike on a sequoia tree.

 

[L' Hobo]

You think you got it bad, this was in the aube yesterday, quite spectacular lightning strike on a sequoia tree.

Wow!

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[Gingernuts]

You might want to get one of these on your next trip to France and keep it for emergencies. They vary in quality so it can be a bit hit and miss but you won't starve.

View attachment 917030

Where did you get the small tins of cassoulet as I could only find the anti tank mine size in Auchan?

 

[DBK]

Where did you get the small tins of cassoulet as I could only find the anti tank mine size in Auchan?

Photo pinched off the Web - but you're right they normally come in larger sizes although for two that's what you want.

The French do some good food in tins and some weird stuff in jars too.

 

[RustyRuss]

Left Jumiere at 8.30am, panicking slightly that 48miles in 2 hours may not be doable. (As if!!!)
Got to Dieppe at 10am, so an hour and a half, including a 20 minute detour because F*****g Google F*****g Maps couldn’t make up its mind until the very last, too late, second about a right or a left fork in the road. DFDS ferries publish an address in Dieppe for the ferry port. Very flaming funny DFDS!! It’s on the wrong side of the harbour from the ferry terminal!!! Now I’m like Vlad the Impaler and want agonisingly painful revenge on the knobs that wrote the wrong address. They publish GPS coordinates in the exceptionally tiny small print, this is a 20 minute detour al around Dieppe, so we got to the ferry terminal at 10.30, so it DOES take 2 hours to get from Jumière to Dieppe! I grudgingly bow to superior local knowledge and vow to drop my Iphone in the channel c/w Google flaming Maps as soon as I’ve up dated this thread.

Update:- some Compkete doughnut has caused a big accident whilst looking at Google Maps at the junction of the M23 and M25, and whilst I don’t ever wish anybody (too much) ill I hope he has sustained an injury to his google maps operating index finger

Cheers for now!

Russ

 

[DBK]

This will be no help but my search online for an address and also just looking on Google Maps for the Dieppe ferry terminal all point to the same place.

 

[cyberyacht]

What they really need at Dieppe is a loading ramp from the aire.

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